Chapter 1
We are all creatures of habit. Whether we like it or not our feelings, emotions and decisions are shaped by years of coding on a subconscious level. Because of this, we act on instinct or gut reaction because we have been programmed to do so.
Whether it is from our parents or social influences we are shaped into the adults we have become today. The way people act and react to situations has rubbed off on us over the years and whether it be our parents or friends on a subconscious level we have taken this all in. Their behaviour & thinking tends to shape ours. Positively or negatively.
If we are brought up in a negative household where everyone always looks on the bad side of life and warns us against doing anything other than what is run of the mill, then we will start to think like those around us. Our worldview can become that or pessimism, and we will probably stay in our box and never see a way out of it no matter how much we hate it.
If on the other hand, our parents chose to be a positive influence on our lives, then we will see things in an entirely different light. We will be optimistic and look at the opportunities far more than the risks of what we do.
Of course, there can be exceptions to these rules of thumb, and they may be a generalisation but what is important to note is that our way of seeing the world becomes distorted to match our beliefs and views. We tend to generalise, distort and delete things that do not match our worldview and on a subconscious level are attracted to and seek out what reinforces it.
This could be said to be the reason why good things always seem to happen to the people that have a positive worldview and negative things to those that have the opposite. But again that is to over generalistic and the “positivity industry” farmed out by self-help books and the like has actually been shown to hurt some. Much in the same way as the advertising industry has shaped the concept of the “ideal family” set up which makes anyone not brought up in that “ideal” feel outside of it. The self-help “positivity industry” can embed negative feelings in people not feeling all that confident in the world.
The way our parents, or the people that have influenced our formative years, react to situations, trials and tribulation will imprint itself on our minds and our subconscious. And we may find ourselves behaving similarly or the complete opposite depending on the lessons we learned from their reactions. We respond in these ways because during these formative years our neural networks, psychology and physiology have become programmed without us being aware of it, on the subconscious level. These then become the programs we run when we are faced with similar situations.
This is all basic development psychology, but when we learn this, it can be like a lightning bolt hitting us. It can be the answer to all our wonderings as to why we just reacted that way when someone gave us a compliment. Why we respond as we do positively or negatively to any given situation. It can also be the answer to our own problems in the way we look at life.
Learning and understanding this is the first step to improving our communication ability as well as enhancing our own mental state.
The first part of this article series we will look at sales and communication techniques using this knowledge so that you can learn to sell our ideas, argument and services to people on a subconscious level.
In the second part, we will look at how these techniques and this knowledge can increase your enjoyment of sales and improve your quality of life.
next read
Persuasion tools for shaping change - Chapter 2
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