Lesson 4: Take away the right to buy or agree with you
This is basic and simple psychology that you have probably heard a thousand times before but it has a very strong psychological basis behind it. Reverse psychology in selling, negotiation and debates have never been more powerful.
Consumers, prospects and the general public are getting tired of being told to buy, or sign up now. Power words that used to work in marketing in the past have less effect on people today. Outdated salesmen might disagree and stick to their over the top sales pitches but subtly is far greater and far more powerful than over the top loud sales or persuasion techniques and power words.
Reverse psychology is one of the very basic lessons we learn in childhood. Our mothers used it on us to get us to eat our food “Well if you don’t want it I will give it to your father.” Nothing would get us eating our food quicker.
People are so sick, today, of being told that they need to buy this now that if you reverse this and say they can’t buy or sign up to it right there and then, or that you don’t want to sell them this product or service or get them to agree with us now that they won’t expect it.
More importantly, this works on a deeply psychological level. Tell a person to buy now and they say "no thanks I will wait around for the next deal" tell someone they can't have something though and this triggers an entirely different cognitive response. That of "You can't tell me that I can't buy it now." That of independence.
Take away a person’s independence and their right to decide and you will find yourself fighting a revolution.
Take away their chance, or right, to buy and they will fight you to get that chance back!
This goes back to the days when we didn’t have the right to decide. When we were children and our parents said, we could or couldn’t do something. When there was little or no choice.
Now that we are adults we do not like to be told what we can and can’t do and we certainly do not like to be told what we can and can’t spend our money on, who we should and should not vote for and so on. So, a salesperson, a negotiator or debater that say “No I am afraid I don’t think this is for you” is taking away our right to decide which will make us want the product even more.
On top of this you are building a new level of trust with the person on a subconscious level. You are saying to their subconscious that you are not only looking out for their needs you are also more concerned with them than the sale. This builds that all-important trust that we are striving for and it builds it on a subconscious level. So, when you temporarily break that trust, that bond and that rapport the subject will work harder to bring it back.
You should be able to recognise when you have got a hit with reverse psychology because the person’s body language will visibly change. This could be different for different people and this is the reason why when looking at using body language as a tool you need to ignore major rules and calibrate by focusing on the person. When their body language visibly changes, this will relate to a change in their state of mind for the good or the bad.
In this situation, their face may have an annoyed expression. A furrowed brow, chin down, eyebrows up and lips pursed to counteract your reverse psychology. Their hand may come out. This will be a subconscious reaction where they are sticking their hand out to stop you. Their eyes may narrow. They may even take hold of your arm or hand to psychically stop what is happening.
If this happens don’t snatch your arm away or become defensive use this as a tool to your advantage. Psychical contact is good. It builds bonds and builds a connection. If they put their hand on you slow you’re talking down, look them directly in the eye and wait for their objection. Keep the eye contact as they tell you how much they want it. Make them agree that if you can get one for them there and then they will sign the deal. This will send a message to their brain that they have to be fast. That they owe it to you and that you are doing them a favour.
Lesson 4: Take away the right to buy or agree. This will go against their feeling of independent decision making and build trust on a subconscious level.
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